Article by Pastor Michael McCartney
Stressed?
Dr. Colbert states in Stress Less, “In my opinion, stress is the pressures of life and how one perceives, believes, reacts, and copes with these pressures” (7). He gives us all some sound advice in managing the stress in our lives so that it does not drown us and put us over the edge: He first tells us that we have to get control of our thoughts if we ever want any hope in managing stress! He notes that we can transform our thoughts and our thinking patterns. He tells us that we can alter our perceptions of life and its stressors. He tells us we can quit fighting against the stressors and learn to be able to ride them like a surfer rides the waves of the ocean.
The Bible tells us that getting control of our thought patterns is possible. Listen to what it says in Philippians 4:4-9: 4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
Notice what it says in verses 4-7! Rejoice- choose to rejoice and not be stressed and then depressed! This is the first step to changing our perceptions about life. Do not be anxious- In other words trust God to work out everything in your life and learn to relax in the faithfulness of the Lord. Let go of the anxiety of stress. Let go of its continuous drip into your mind and heart.
Pray – when you are anxious in life learn to ask for the Lord’s help so that you can calm down.
Pray and ask the Lord to change your thinking and your perceptions about this life. Be thankful – in other words learn to appreciate the good things in your life. Learn to remember the blessings that the Lord has given you! Learn to say, “Thank You to the Lord!” This act of praise will change your perceptions! If you do these little things everyday then you will have peace the Word tells us. Maxwell stated, “What you do today determines what you will be tomorrow!”
If we learn the importance of doing these little things daily then it says God’s peace will guard our hearts and our minds. In other words this is great advice in preventing a heart attack in your life!
Dr. Colbert states, “According to the Mayo Clinic study of people with heart disease, psychological stress was the strongest predictor of future cardiac events” (13). He also noted, “In one ten-year study, people who were not able to manage their stress effectively had a 40% higher death rate than those who were ‘unstressed’” (13).
Also notice what Doctor Paul says in verses 5-9: Paul the Doctor of your well being says, “Do you want peace of mind and do you want to prevent a heart attack? Then think about the good things in life! Think on things that praiseworthy and excellent! Look at the positive side of life instead of always focusing on the negative side of life! It will prevent you from having a heart attack and from you losing your mind!” He agrees with Dr. Colbert – change you thinking and how you perceive those stressful events in life. The truth is we do have the power and the help from God to change the way we perceive our life and this world’s stressors.
Dr. Colbert quotes Deut. 30:19, 20a: “19This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live 20and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life…” He states this about this text: “Choosing life means to choose God’s way over our way; it means to choose a relationship with Him and obedience to Him over our own self-centered desires. Most factors to stress are subject to your choice” (17).
The truth is what you perceive is really your reality! It’s all in how you decide to look at it!
The way we perceive stressful events impacts our bodies reaction to stress and our emotional state. Remember this – Stress is found in everyone’s life but the ones who manage it well go on and live long lives filled with contentment and peace. Remember this – Our perception of an event will make it either positive or negative. It is really up to us to decide which will gain control of our minds and hearts.
Dr. Colbert states, “Your perceptions determine how you see the world. The mind is similar to a computer –the brain is the hard drive, and the perceptions are the ‘software.’ It is the perception of people, demands, issues, and circumstances-not the actual people, demands, issues, or circumstances in and of themselves-that dictate how a person will react” (33). He notes several distorted thought patterns that people adopt in life.
I. All-or-nothing thinking – For this kind of person, there are no gray areas. Anything less than his standard of ‘perfect’ is worthless (38).
II. Overgeneralizations – A person who overgeneralizes thinks that if one thing goes wrong, nothing will ever go right for him ever (39).
III. A negative mental filter – This kind of distortional thinking causes a person to hear a half hour of praise after a job evaluation but leave the meeting depressed because of one area ‘needing improvement’ (39).
IV. Disqualifying the positive – Even more distortional is when a person takes a positive experience and turns it into a negative one. These kind of thinkers feel they are not worthy of any praise under any circumstances (40).
V. Jumping to conclusions – People who jump to conclusions predict the worst possible outcome or circumstance without having any, or all, the facts to support their conclusions (41).
a. Mind reading- you arbitrarily conclude that someone is reacting negatively to you, and you don’t bother to check this out (40).
b. The fortune teller error – you anticipate that things will turn out badly, and you feel convinced that your prediction is an already –established fact.
VI. Magnification (catastrophizing) or minimization – You exaggerate the importance of things (such as your goof up or someone else’s achievement), or you inappropriately shrink things until they appear tiny (your own desirable qualities or the other fellow’s imperfections).
VII. Emotional reasoning – You assume that your negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things really are: “I feel it, therefore it must be true.” (41).
VIII. Fixed rule thinking- This person is a ‘should,’ ‘must,’ or ‘ought to’ person. He confines people and events to his rules and fails to realize the fact that he can’t force anyone to adhere to them. The more rigid the rules, the greater the person’s disappointment. That disappointment usually plays out as worry, depression. Frustration, irritation, or guilt (43).
IX. Labeling and mislabeling – A person who attaches a negative label to himself or someone else tends to do so because of his own low self-esteem (43).
X. Personalization – This kind of thinking shifts the blame of an outcome on self. Unfortunately in our society, many children who come from dysfunctional homes become trapped in this kind of thinking: “Daddy left mommy because I was bad” (44).
XI. Life is fair, and everybody is entitled to a good life – The truth is life is not fair. (45).
XII. I need to be liked and accepted by everyone- Truth is not everybody will like you (45).
XIII. People should behave properly – If you expect other people to always behave toward you in the way you consider ‘proper’ you will live in a state of frustration, anger and stress (45).
XIV. The worst outcome will probably occur – The worst outcome is rarely what comes to pass. Worrying about things beyond your control leads to excessive stress (45).
XV. I am unable to change the way I am – This belief is guaranteed to lead to stress (46).
Dr. Colbert notes that these distortional thoughts and beliefs are rooted in the thought that life owes us something. But he states, “There is nothing written in the cosmos of the Word of God that declares this to be true. Life owes you nothing; you owe life something” (47)! The truth is a lot of our stress comes from us allowing the faulty thinking to take root in our minds and in our hearts. Proverbs 23:7a NKJV states, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he…”
